PG13 Pushes Sex, Drugs, and Alcohol on Our Children

Wow!  It is nearly impossible to find an age appropriate movie for pre-teens!  My daughter was invited by a friend to go see “THE HOUSE BUNNY”.  When I looked it up and read the description and the rating, I had to call the mom and tell her that it was inappropriate for my 12 year old girl to see.  The movie is rated “PG-13 for sex-related humor, partial nudity, and brief strong language.” The description read: “The protagonist is Hef's favorite and acts like a den mother to the other girls. On her birthday, she is unceremoniously evicted from Hef's pad for 'being too old.' Homeless and without essential skills, Shelley wanders around L.A. until she finds a new job--the housemother at the most unpopular sorority on campus.”

I know that her daughter wanted to see it, but when I read the description, the mom gasped on the other end and admitted that she had not read the listings.  Really, how tame can a Play Boy movie be.  It is absolutely NOT FOR KIDS! Then the mom suggested seeing “DISASTER MOVIE”.  As I was still on the movie website, I read the description and rating out loud. “PG-13 for crude and sexual content throughout, language, drug references, and comic violence.”  “DISASTER MOVIE follows the comic misadventures of a group of ridiculously attractive twenty-somethings during one fateful night as they try to make their...” See Full Description 

Not giving up, I continued to search for something more age appropriate.  “STAR WARS” was rated PG and the other mom agreed that it would be fun for all to see. Even PG movies have inappropriate content.  A parent has to guess just how crude or rude the jokes might be. I have had many unexpected surprises in the theater with my kids. 

When I told my daughter that we had agreed on STAR WARS, she began to flip out about it being “boring” and for “little kids”. Not two minutes went by, when the phone rang.  It was her girlfriend calling to complain about the movie selection.

Again, I spoke to the mother and we decided to forget the movie and just let them hang out at her house for a couple of hours.  Curious, I re-entered yahoo’s movie page and read the PG13 rating of the other movies listed.  Funny how they are all so different, but the same nonetheless.  The pervasive theme is sex, drugs, and alcohol.  Who does Hollywood think they are exploiting our young children pushing sex, drugs, and alcohol on them?!!!!!  Here are some more ratings I found for films currently showing in theaters:

Vicky Cristina Barcelona:

Two women travel to Barcelona.  One of them is emotionally and SEXUALLY adventurous. In Barcelona, they're drawn into a series of unconventional romantic entanglements

PG-13 for mature thematic material involving sexuality, and smoking.

Babylon A.D.

PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, language and some sexuality.

Disaster Movie

PG-13 for crude and sexual content throughout, language, drug references and comic violence.

Dark Night (Critics agree that it is far too dark and scary for children.)

PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and some menace.

Mama Mia!

PG-13 for some sex-related comments.  My husband and I loved the movie, but the non-stop sexual innuendos, the protagonist not marrying her fiance and instead sailing off with him to pursue HIS dream, and the cougar/teenage romance were enough for us to chose NOT to take our children to see this film.

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2

PG-13 for mature material and sensuality.  I’d have to see this one first to determine how much mature material and sensuality it really contains.

Beware of Sales Reps Posing as D.A.R.E . Volunteers

Yesterday I went to my local drug store to pick up a prescription for my daughter.  On the way out, a young man asked me to help out D.A.R.E.  He said that the charity was in danger of folding due to lack of funds.  Glad to help a good cause that helps children, I gave him a $20 bill.  As he reached for his receipt book, he told me that I owed $1.78 sales tax.  Surprised, I asked him since when is sales tax charged on donations.  He smoothly responded, "Because it is considered a "merchandise exchange".   I received a T-Shirt and a cheesy children's book for my $20 "donation".  I had no use for either item, and planned to give it to Goodwill.

My prescription would take over an hour to fill, so I decided to get a bite to eat.  As I was finishing my lunch, the young man and woman manning the D.A.R.E. table walked in.  I was struck by the suit and tie the young man was sporting, especially in 100 degree weather.  More eye opening was the designer handbag the young woman had on her arm.  

When I arrived home, I went to file the receipt.  That is when I notice something was wrong.  The receipt did not have D.A.R.E. nor the words "Donation" or "Charity" as is customary on a charitable organization's receipt.  In fact, the receipt read: Redline Marketing Company.  I quickly flipped the receipt over and read the back.  To my shock and horror, the opening line read: "5% of the amount of your purchase will be remitted to DARE."  What?!!!  I gave them $20 thinking that D.A.R.E. would receive $20.  5% of $20 is just $1!  

The receipt went on to say that the people I made my "purchase" from were not D.A.R.E. volunteers, but paid sales employees of the company listed on the front of the receipt!  I immediately called the 800 number for D.A.R.E.  The young woman who answered the phone must have been like a deer caught in the headlights as she did not say much.  She told me that she was new and that there were no supervisors present.  She then told me to go online to LogisticAdvertisingInc.com and that I would have to figure out how to get my refund myself as she did not know how to help me.

Frustrated, I hung up and noticed a number on the front of the receipt below Redline Marketing Company.  I called that number and another young woman answered saying she was with yet another marketing company called Paradym Marketing, or something to that effect.  So, now I am up to 3 marketing companies involved in some kind of a pyramid scheme with D.A.R.E.  The young woman told me to return to the table the next day and I could demand my refund.

So, today I went marching up to the table.  As I arrived, there were 5 high school students talking to the young man who misrepresented himself to me the day before.  He was counting a huge wad of cash and appeared to be giving one of the young men a refund.  I asked that high school student if they had been ripped off too.  He said that they were making a "donation".  I told him that D.A.R.E. would only get 5% of his "donation"  and that the two men were in fact paid salesmen.  

As he turned to walk away with his group of friends, the high school student yelled out something that one of the salesmen understood like they were friends or somehow knew each other.   Not knowing what they meant or how they were involved, I demanded my refund. 

 I told the 2 young men there that they had misrepresented themselves to me.  They smoothly said they were very sorry that I felt that way.  I told them that as far as I was concerned, they were committing fraud.  They began to argue with me, when I told them I was not going to argue with them and to just give me back the $22 I gave them the day before.  The young man from the day before handed my the $22 and I left.

I entered the drug store and informed the manager of the fraud being perpetrated on his customers.  He was very disturbed and thought that the "volunteers" were over dressed.  He told me that his hands were tied.  He did not authorize them to be there.  Apparently, they got permission (or maybe they did not) from the landlord.

I contacted 7 On Your Side, a consumer alert group.  I do intend to talk to some one higher up in D.A.R.E. on Monday.  This type of practice only gives D.A.R.E. a big black eye.

Dancing with the Stars Workout DVD

It finally arrived.  I had to wait 2 weeks for my FedEx package.  I immediately popped the first DVD into the player.  I was not dressed to workout, but could not help myself.  I actually did break a sweat, which is good for me.  

I did feel a bit tighter around the middle.  I really felt the workout in my back.  Like I said in an earlier post, the first day of school, I threw out my back.  I'm not sure if this workout had anything to do with that.  It is hard to say.  I do believe that it is on a long list of things that led up to my back going out on me.

So far, I was only able to view that first DVD.  I am laid up until my back stops complaining.  Boy does it hurt!  Prior to this injury, I did not realize how every single movement, no matter how minute, involves the lower back muscles.:(

Stranger Danger for Senior Citizens

It was my worst nightmare. Having finished breakfast, my 78 year old father says, “Wait till you hear this one…” I immediately braced myself, as I usually do upon hearing those words. Dad will often wait “awhile” before telling me about the BAD things that happen to him. This was no exception.

Gritting my teeth and holding onto my chair, I welcomed his story. He continued to tell me that about a week ago there was a knock at his door. When he opened the door, he was greeted by a young man who said he was the neighbor’s son. Or at least that is what dad understood amidst the commotion his dog was making to ward off the intruder.

Dad had been looking forward to meeting his new neighbor’s son, and was happy to meet him. The young man said his wife had been in an accident and that he needed $8.00. Happy to oblige, dad pulled out a $20 and handed it to the man. Then, the man asked dad for a ride downtown. Dad said he was waiting for an important phone call from a car dealer, as he was in the process of negotiating the purchase of a new pick up truck. At that, the young man stepped inside and said he would wait.

Once inside, the young man asked dad for a glass of water. So, dad being hospitable offers the man a beer! Once he had finished the beer, the young man asked for another beer. Dad obliged. By now, the man had ranted on and on about his life and troubles and dad said he realized what he had done. Eager to get the stranger out of the house, dad decided to forget about the phone call and told the man he’d give him that ride he had asked for.

I asked dad where he took the man. He said he dropped him off downtown by the train station. Yikes! That’s where all the derelicts hang out. I was so upset, but grateful that dad was okay. This could have ended very badly, and it could happen to anyone let alone an aging parent.

School's Back in and Mom is Down

I was so excited Tuesday morning. I dropped off the girls at school and went straight to the gym to start shedding my summertime pounds. I had a great work out. I was off to a great start. On the way home from they gym, I decided to save time and gas by stopping at the grocery store to pick up a few things.

Everything was great until I could not see the price of the bulk-sized bag of lettuce hidden behind a display. I refused to pay $4 for a half a bag of lettuce. So, as I leaned slightly forward to peer behind the display hiding the price of the larger bag, my back snapped! I almost landed on my knees on the way down, but caught myself. I was shocked and in severe pain. It took all of my strength to make it to the check out stand. I will spare you the details of how long it took me to crawl into my SUV and drive home.

Now, I'm laid up for Labor Day Weekend. We are supposed to go canoe camping with 3 other families. Isn't that perfect? I did not realize that every movement involves the spine. The smallest movements are so painful. My family did not realize how much I do for them. They are helping out, but I can see my husband becoming anxious for my rapid recovery.

Summertime Weight Gain & Dancing With the Stars

Well, school got out about 2 months ago and I have only been able to get to the gym literally a handful of times. My big plan to go to the gym every morning from 9 a.m. to 10 a.m. while the girls were at swim practice backfired as they have barely gone to swim practice all summer. And if one child actually managed to roll out of bed in time to jump into a pool full of frigid water, the other child either would not or could not get out of bed.

Needless to say, I have gained at least 6 pounds since my kids have been home. I actually broke down and ordered an exercise program I saw on TV called Core Rhythm. I recall dancing myself thin way back in 6th grade before jazzercise had ever been invented, so I figured I'd give it a try.

I've been anxiously awaiting the upgraded program. Yep! I got suckered into the upgrade. I hate when that happens! You'd think that for over $150 they could deliver in a week's time. It has not arrived and I ordered it 9 days ago. Yesterday I sent an email to Core Rhythms asking for the status of my shipment. Twenty four hours later, I have not received an answer. So, today I picked up the phone and dialed what I hope was a toll free number. The recording informed me that they just processed my credit card payment yesterday! So far, I am not impressed with their efficiency.

I'll let you know whether it works or not. At this rate, the kids will be back in school by the time it arrives!:{ I actually thought my girls might get something out of it. They refuse to take dance classes, but seem to really enjoy dancing. So, now if it would just arrive, I can get to work!

How Much is Hollywood to Blame?

Unfortunately, parents are still at the mercy of Hollywood. Our children deserve and crave good programming, but they we getting it? I guess that depends on whose definition of “good” you are talking about.

My Mommy definition of “good programming” is the following: Programs that are age appropriate with honest age-related ratings such that I as a parent can easily see that a program is suitable for my children. The current system fails families miserably. There should be a more comprehensive rating system. The current G, PG, PG13, R rating system is just not cutting it. The jump from PG13 to R seems to have been blurred. My experience is that they are pretty much the same. Likewise, I fail to see much difference if any between G and PG movies. And let’s be honest, PG movies are of no interest to most children 10 years and up.

I mean, did my kids really need to see Vince Vaughn beat up Santa Claus in Fred Claus? This movie was rated PG13 for rude comments. I don’t know how many times I heard the characters say “Crap!” All the mommies had to sit there and endure the on-going argument between Vaughn and his girl friend who breaks up with him because Vaughn won’t move in with her.

The ratings just don’t tell us anything. I recently told my sister that I had seen Mama Mia! (rated PG13) with my husband. She said she couldn’t wait to take her 12 year old daughter to see it. Surprised, I suggested she see it first and then decide if it was appropriate for her 12 year old to see. In my opinion this movie, while excellent, is filled with sexual innuendo that, frankly, mommies will have to explain on the spot in the theater because kids just have to know what it going on.

I’ll never forget when my girlfriend and I went to see Because I Said So (rated PG13). There was a scene where the mother and daughter were discussing the fact that the mother had never had an orgasm and asked her daughter what it was like. 2 little heads popped up a couple of rows down and the entire theater heard, “Hey mom. What’s an orgasm?” MORTIFYING! Then, there were a couple of scenes where grandma was getting it on (although fully dressed) with her new lover. Whose idea was it that our children should be exposed to movies with sexual content?

Then there’s the issue of violence. This summer I took my girls to see Get Smart (rated PG13). I loved watching the series as a child, so I was excited for the girls to see it. I was shocked at the violence. My kids, whom I’ve taken great pains to protect from seeing murders on TV and movies, witnessed some 30 murders in a matter of 60 minutes! I was mortified and wondered when we would ever sleep through the night again.:{

Then came the seen were Max is trying to get the keys out of the pocket of his unconscious kidnapper. A bad guy walking by peeks in the window and sees what appears to be a gay sexual act. Oh heck! Max, the hero, appeared to be humping the passed out bad guy. There! I said it! Of course the audience erupts in laughter. Confused, my eleven year old daughter leans in and says, “Hey mom. Why is everybody laughing?”:{

I know we have gone around and around with Hollywood on this issue, but the current system is completely inadequate and irresponsible. More care needs to be taken when rating movies and television programming for kids. Maybe Hollywood could redefine PG13 and remove all murder and sexual innuendo from movies targeting our children and add a rating in between like PG16, which would be a more appropriate rating for movies with both sexually implicit and explicit material. Such a rating system would be very helpful to all parents in determining what is appropriate and what is not. I, for one, am tired of being surprised in my living room and movie theaters.:{ What about you?

You Know Your a Frazzled Mommy When...

your kids see a covered wagon on TV and ask, "Hey mom! What was it like back in the covered wagon days?":{

Dad Got a New Thermostat

Oh boy! Here we go. Brain tumor aside, my busy 78 year old dad is feeling good these days. He just called me in a snit. He had spent some 10 hours trying to figure out how to fix a carpet cleaner. The problem is, he spent the entire day hunched over the machine on the garage floor. Needless to say, the machine is still broken and dad can hardly sit he is so sore!

So, he said he was taking a break from fixing the carpet cleaner.:) Currently, he is wrestling with a new thermostat. Actually, this is the second one. He couldn't get the first one to work and exchanged it for this new one and after about 12 hours of touching the screen (Yep! He went with the high tech model!) when he sets the A/C to 72 degrees, it changes itself to 62 degrees. Then, when he changes the heater to 75 degrees (he likes it warm), it changes itself to 85 degrees.

Dad is so frustrated and sore right now that he doesn't know which end is up. He's so funny!:{

You Know Your a Frazzled Mommy When...

your child runs into you room in the middle of the night and yells, "Mom! My lamp just went off for no reason whatsoever!" Your groggy response: "Yeah Baby. Mommy put a timer on your lamp to shut off at 1 a.m. so I don't have to go into your room in the middle of the night to shut it off. It's been like that for the past week. Go back to bed, Sweetie.

The clincher: My child is upstairs sound asleep in my bed and I am sitting here writing this post at 3:20 a.m.:{ This is going to be a looooong day.

If you are not a FRAZZLED MOMMY...

join your neighborhood swim team. You will be transformed into a full-fledged FRAZZLED MOMMY over night.:) Honestly, we are just now winding down our second season on swim team, and I swear the coach thinks I am a complete air head!:(

After fumbling my way through last year with 13 assigned jobs (You work at the meets or you are fined $75!), figured out how to read the program to get my kids to the right event, correct heat, and actual lane assignment (Absolutely mind boggling!), I thought this year would be a breeze.

Well, concerned that my oldest child had a soccer tournament during the upcoming County Swim Meet, I emailed the coach to let him know we would be unable to participate and to please remove my children from the roster. He very politely thanked me for letting him know, and that for my information, swimmers going to County have to meet a time minimum requirement. Oops! Another air head moment in front of the coach! By now, he's getting used to it. So, either way, we were not going to be there!:{

You Know Your a Frazzled Mommy When...

your kids march downstairs at precisely 6 p.m. and in unison shout, "Ew! What's that SMELL?" Your indignant response? "Your dinner!"

Time to Change Doctors

When we went to see dad's general practitioner, I was not impressed. The doctor really seemed to view my father as just another number rather than a human being in need of healing. I told my father that he deserved much better. Even he admitted that his doctor had not done anything to help him feel better over the previous 2 years.

My dad has high blood pressure. Hypertension is common in elderly men and women alike. The problem , however, is compounded when you have a tumor the size of a golf ball on your pituitary gland. So, dad's blood pressure would be under control for a while, then it would get crazy out of whack with absolutely no warning whatsoever. I'm talking 220 over 110!

Well, this doctor that I was not impressed with, gave my dad a new blood pressure medication, sent him home and told him to come back in a month. Well, 24 hours later, dad was in the Emergency Room with his blood pressure soaring sky high. The doctors at the E.R. said they had notified dad's doctor and that he was going to stop by to see dad. He was a no show. I actually thought he'd give dad a call at home to check on him. Not!

They were about to release dad, so my sister took her crabby 3 year old son home for a nap and I was to transport dad back home. In order to take him home, the E.R. doctor ordered a pill to get rid of dad's nausea. That's when all hell broke loose. Turns out dad was allergic to that particular drug. He began to vomit non-stop. He was so delirious, he couldn't even talk. His eyes were crossed. I thought he was going to die right then and there. I screamed for a nurse to come quick when he began to have the reaction. There was no call button on his bed. If I had not been there, he probably would have died.

When the nurse ran in, she scolded me saying that I had over reacted. Then, when she looked at my father's sudden deterioration, she had to eat her words. They countered the drug with yet another drug. Thank God, it worked! So, dad spent the night in the hospital. He got a kick out of all the yummy food they brought to him.:{

Getting Dad to Eat Again

Finally giving in to my pleas, dad pulled out this George Foreman Grill. He used to love cooking pork chops on his grill. He had forgotten how much he enjoyed it. We aren't sure exactly why he stopped using it.

At first, dad would complain that he just wasn't hungry. Due to the starvation or Anorexia, his stomach would have shrunk to the point of not feeling hungry. A child victim of Anorexia, I knew the drill. I insisted that dad eat three meals a day. It did not matter that he was not hungry. His orders were to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Once he started eating again, it was easy. I called dad each night to see how he was doing and asses what he had eaten that day. He would report with excitement in his voice how easy it was and how delicious his meal was. Even his girlfriend gained weight and began to look much more vibrant.

Dad's energy, however, was still very low and there were days when he couldn't even come to the telephone to talk with me. I became increasingly alarmed. That is when I insisted on making a doctor's appointment for him and tagging along for the ride. Dad was so weak by this point that he really couldn't refuse.

Skinny Dad

As I mentioned earlier, upon visiting my dad one Father's Day, I became alarmed at how thin he and his girlfriend had become. All though dad dieted on and off most of his adult life, (who doesn't these days?) he was never really overweight.

The next day I called him. I started to ask him what he had eaten. He would respond in his weakend voice that he skipped breakfast on a daily basis. He said that he and his girlfriend (suffering from Alzheimer's) usually split a sandwich for lunch. Dinner was a cup of soup! Yikes! They were severly under nurished and starving themselves to death without even knowing it! :(

When I expressed my concern, Dad said they were fine. He added that at their age they just weren't hungry and did not require much food. Well, yeah! One of them could not remember having eaten or not and the other one did not have enough energy to get out of bed!

This was bad, very bad. I asked if his girlfriend didn't cook dinner anymore. That's when dad finally let me in on the big secret of her Alzheimers. He said she was confused in the kitchen, so it became unsafe for her to cook anymore.

That's when I told dad that he was going to have to cook the meals from now on. When I pointed out the fact that they were only eating 400 or so calories a day, even dad had to admit that it was not enough to keep a bird alive.

Which Disease Do We Attack First?

Fate would have it that we didn't have a choice about which problem to attack first. Neither disease (my father's pituitary tumor or his girlfriend's Alzheimer's Disease) had a cure. Dad's girlfriend could not be treated with the latest drugs on the market to slow down the progression of the disease because her thyroid was out of whack.

Her thyroid got that way because she was not taking her thyroid medications as prescribed because of the Alzheimer's. She just could not remember having taken it or not. Once dad figured that out, he went out and purchased a weekly organizer for her prescriptions so that he could monitor them and be sure she took her medications each day. Even so, it took over a year to get her thyroid back in the range required to begin taking the Alzheimer's drugs. It just took too long.

Meanwhile, Dad's deteriorating health was keeping me up at night. I was scared to death. My dad was doing a very noble thing in caring for his ailing girlfriend, but he was doing it at the expense of his own life. With absolutely no help from her daughters, dad was completely on his own in caring for her. This is a daunting task for a much younger, much healthier person let alone for a man in his late 70's suffering from the affects of a brain tumor.

Our Aging Parents

My parents are now in their late 70's. Mom is 77 and Dad is 78. They were divorced a hundred years ago, so they live in two different houses in two different cities. It made for a very interesting Thanksgiving and Christmas dilemma, especially given the fact that I lived over an hour away from both of them.

It has been so weird to see over the course of time, while raising my children, suddenly becoming responsible for my parents for the first time. It started a couple of years ago, when I detected my father's frail voice on the telephone. There were days when he was so weak, he could not even answer the phone. I remember visiting him one Father's Day and being alarmed at how thin he and his girlfriend had become. He really was a shadow of the powerful man I knew growing up.

I began to ask questions. Dad has never been one to really open up and talk on an intimate level, so it took a lot of phone calls and persistent prying to get to the bottom of what was really going on. After a year and a half, Dad finally admitted to me that his girl friend had Alzheimer's. Add to that the fact that my father had a tumor on his pituitary gland the size of a golf ball, and my father was going down hill on the express train.

The Sandwiched Frazzled Mommy

Wow! Who would have signed up for this job knowing the job description going in? Not many, that's for sure! If you are anything like me, you are really feeling the squeeze between kids, aging parents, and a failing economy. While this is not a political sight, I have to say that I have never been so frightened about the future in all my 44 years on this planet. And that includes growing up with images of the Vietnam War, the prospect of Nuclear Annihilation during the Cold War, and now the War on Terror!

No matter how you look at it, or spin it for that matter, we mommies have a daunting task ahead of us. Add to that our aging bodies. Let's face it, Mother Nature (another FRAZZLED MOMMY) is now doing a number on us that has most of us in a tailspin. I am now packing on the pounds, while my Frazzled Daddy husband is losing weight without even trying! It just isn't fair, but if we ban together and support each other, this too shall pass.

You Know Your a Frazzled Mommy When...

following a verbal debate with your 4 year old, blond, blue eyed daughter, she walks up to you arms folded and says, "Mommy, the parenting class is NOT working!"

I got this one from my dear friend Cathy who has two years more experience as a Frazzled Mommy than me. That child is now 14 and on to much bigger and better conquests, but we still sit around the coffee table or campfire every year and have a good laugh over that one. It just never gets old.